TEN USEFUL TIPS: Student's Productions 01

10 TIPS FOR YOUR OPPONENT TO BE     TERRIFIED PLAYING SOCCER

1)Tell your opponent: If you score a goal la llorona will get you.
2)Tell your opponent: If you get the ball the boogeyman will get you.
3) Tell your opponent: If you play well I will hit you.
4) Tell your opponent: If you head the ball your head will fall down.
5) Tell your opponent: If you look back you will see la monja.
6) Tell your opponent: If you come near me I tear the head.
7) Tell your opponent: If you hit me I will tell your mom.
8) Tell your opponent: If I hit you and you tell the referee, I will hit you more.
9) Tell your opponent: If you dont miss de penalty I will put a spider on your head.
10) If you dont win the game you will kill yourself.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

www.FAILURES.com.ar

TEN USEFUL

       TIPS

“HOW TO RUIN YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND”

AUTHORS:Fernandez Renata , Salomon Rocio , Martini Oriana

1)If you want to break with him or her you tell the:, it’s not you , it’s me. I hooked up with your brother (or sister).

2)If you ask for borrowed clothes , let him know it’s for another.

3)If he calls you on the phone because he is worried , don’t answer him and go to the Disco.

4)If you see them pretend you don’t know them and cross the street.

5)If them say they love you , run.

6)If you celebrate months together , give them a hat and tell them it’s to cover the horns.

7)If you are having sex , tell them the name of their father or mother.

8)If you go out to dinner , fart and belch.

9)If you want to make him feel bad , put a photo of your ex in your desktop.

10) If you want to humiliate him , put on a thong and take him out to the street.

IF ANY OF THESE TIPS DIDN’T WORK FOR YOU , KILL YOURSELF.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Mili & Axel

Ten useful tips about how to survive a unicorn zombie apocalypse

1-      If the unicorns are coming for you, give them grass

2-      If the Unicorn is furious, put Justin Bieber’s music.

3-      If one Unicorn stabs you with his horn, you will turn into a zombie.

4-      If you try to ride one, prepare for the fun part.

5-      If you commit suicide, you won’t turn into one of them.

6-      If the apocalypse starts, go to a EDM Party.

7-      If you adopt one, call him “Cerberus”.

8-      If you need transport, rent a horse.

9-      If you are stressed for the apocalypse, take 16 lines of blow and you’ll be fine.

10-   If you don’t wanna die, praise the devil.